I embrace my desire to

Feel the rhythm,

To feel connected,

Enough to step aside and,

Weep like a widow,

To feel inspired,

To fathom the power,

To witness the beauty,

To bathe in the fountain,

To swing on the spiral,

To swing on the spiral,

To swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human…

I have fallen.. Failed myself to the point I’m ashamed to admit it… Never shall I let my life be an open book.. Cast off so carelessly and now, I lay here ridden with regrets… 

For reasons unknown, a stranger of sorts has been unbelievably sweet and graceful enough to share a year of her life with me. I have sincerely not felt this roller coaster of emotions my entire life and I’m glad you let me hitch along for the ride. You may not realise it but you have been nothing less than supportive of childish fancies and ways. ( Well, most of the time atleast!)
You taught me that however much we desire loneliness and believe that its much easier not to lean on people, we all falter and need someone to whisper to us that its going to be alright. You’re the little spark that came into my life and fixed me back again. You let me lean on you and it was only when you believed in me, did I grow the strength to believe in myself.

I can’t help but wonder what will happen in the years to come, but I can only hope you’d walk with me through this beautiful thing called life. Thanks for the bitter fights, sweet kisses, quiet dinners, ridiculously late night calls. precious gifts and the warmest of hugs. I can’t repay them but I promise I’ll be there for those minutes in between.

I bought a kite and I really didn’t want to fly it unless you came along. So next week we’ll try flying it together, okay?.. I miss you and I keep wanting to spend more time with you. Its probably cause I feel I am more myself with you than with anyone else. Even a day apart seems too long..

P.S: I need you. Desperately.

Hmmm.. Intelligence WOSPEC course is alot more difficult than I thought it would be. Alot of studying and it seems like its not my thing. But I won’t give in. Best trainee for the win.
Anyways, just finished The Monk who sold His Ferrari and its a pretty good book and it teaches us quite a few things. But all the same, the lessons learnt by readers of an idealistic way to live our lives so wonderfully with so much purpose, dies off pretty quickly and then, its back to square one. We all want to embrace a greater calling but sometimes the steps towards it seem so unnatural and we fall back to our excuses to avoid them. Its about time we really stop to think about what forces us to be afraid of the norms the world forces us to succumb to. I can’t help but feel I do so often scurry back into that reality when all I want is to break free. Yet the answers lie right infront of me and I am so enthusiastic about reading and understanding them. However the sheer thought of trying already exhausts me.I guess we need to make a bigger effort if we wanna change our lives.
As for me I enjoyed the good read but I satisfied with the way I live my own life. All the same it’ll be good to try some stuff and I will.

Need to remind myself to keep quiet and be more of a listener while accepting that people are at different paces in life. Understanding this will give me more patience. But just thought you should know, I was dead tired and had a fucking long day. But I still wanted to meet you. Just wished it didn’t turn out to be such waste for you.
All is well still and I’m on a stay-out course which is just awesome. 
So here goes trying something from the book, stating your dreams reminds your mind to retain those very thoughts.
      
          Wishlist.
      1. New specs.
      2. Blackberry phone ( But that’s too ex.)
      3. Cycling at Ubin.
      4. Muay thai for April. (Yes, FIGHT-G! I’m COMING BACK)
      5. Movie Marathon ( Bothered to write down the movies during my break)
      6.Save up $2000 and go scuba-diving!
      7. Save up a whole lot more and go Australia for some SKYDIVING!
      - Deathwish Travels here I come.